Sunday, 24 April 2016

#IRPanel: Friendship

IRL. in real life. one of those new terms that confuse my parents on whatsapp, but to a room of certain individuals, it means everything. friendships, relationships, careers these days are built online, but what happens when these transfer to real life? well. in the case of emma gannon and laura williams, a friendship was born, which led to this - #IRLpanel, a panel hosted by women off the internet.

i wrote about the first ever panel a few months ago (which you can read here) with such gusto and passion, i knew i just HAD to attend the next one. i hadn't felt so excited to write in a long time, and if that stemmed from being in a room with like minded people, i knew that a ticket had to be mine. i was lucky and bagged two tickets to the latest panel which discussed friendship. 

friendship is a touchy subject, especially amongst women. whilst i see myself as lucky to have a strong group of female friends who definitely support me, i have had past friendships which have disintegrated without me even knowing, or even fizzled away leaving bad tastes in both of our mouths and now when we see each other we smirk and turn away. it's not as clear cut as a relationship. what are the rules? well, emma, laura, jade, nadin and lucy (PLEASE CLICK THEIR LINKS AND CHECK THEM OUT. THEY'RE AMAZING. cheers) set out to discuss. 

i've listed the most tweetable quotes of the night, so please feel free to comment and say what friendship is to you. i'd be ever so interested.

friendship is someone to help you navigate the torture of human life.
this made me laugh, and 100% agree. i am british, i am sarcastic, and i am cynical. i am well aware life is not always rainbows and smiles, as the girl in mean girls so eloquently cried. a large amount of my friendships are spent moaning about things. but that's ok with me. we can cry together, we can moan together, but we can also celebrate and be happy together. the up often outweighs the bad. 

the love of my life is my best friend.
this is honestly one of the nicest things i've ever heard, and belongs on greetings cards everywhere. this gem came from nadin, who stated that her number one person in her life is her best friend. it doesn't matter if you don't see them everyday, or even speak everyday, as long as you have that person you would call if you were crying, laughing or any other're doing ok.

people come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
this is a quote that really resonated with me. it comes from the stem of conversation that people are in your life for defining moments, and sometimes those moments last a lifetime, and other times they may be a year. we all have those friends who, at university or school, you couldn't imagine life forward, you're 23 and you just gave them a polite smile when you passed them in asda. it happens. but you also get the people who just won't leave...and those ones are pretty special.

social media is testing us to be better friends.
social media is a big deal in friendships. we can all relate to being a little bit peeved if our best friend doesn't remember to write happy birthday on our wall, or seen that a group of friends all went for spontaneous drinks and seemed to forget to extend that invite to you. and we are all guilty on clicking 'maybe' on that event, knowing full well we have no intention of going whatsoever. it's allowed us to get lazy, and instead of talking to each other about problems we simply screenshot pictures and convos that annoy us, and never raise it irl. 

let's stop letting social media do our talking for us, and value our friendships in real life. it's all very well having 60000 friends on Facebook, but when you have no one to call when you get that promotion, it's time to step outside the complacency of social media. 

you can be complicit in the drifting of a friendship. 
this is the one that stuck with me. the awkwardness of a friendship drifting apart can be well known to both parties, but there is a silent contract between you that you won't bring it up, and just let it be. there is no malice, no 'it's not you, it's me' talk. just two friends walking further away from each other, until eventually you can't even remember what it was you had in common in the first place. there doesn't have to be a drama, but in reality it can feel like the worst thing in the world. no one wants to lose friends, but sometimes you can have fulfilled your role in each others lives, and move on. it's ok. it's life. but a hard lesson to learn. 

thank you IRL for continuing to nurture my brain and push me to continue writing. i haven't felt so inspired since i was much younger, and i hope to one day even be on that panel with you. the can do attitude of the ladies makes me think that HELL YEAH i can write that book i've always wanted to write, and ofc one day i can be one that panel. because if they can do it, why can't i?

until next time xo


we need to talk about lemonade

we often forget how it feels to be truly moved and affected by talent these days. amongst the mindless news of naked selfies, celebrity feuds and other trivial matters that we all involve ourselves in, it can be a shock to the system when we remember the true talent of the celebrities that grace the sidebar of shame daily. sometimes it takes a tragedy of a legend to remember their work, but in this case, it just took one word. 


twenty four hours ago you'd be excused if lemonade just meant a refreshing carbonated drink to you. but that was then, and in the space of a day queen b herself has taken the term to a new level. lemonade is her latest album offering, presented to us in the form of a visual album that took my breath away. 

i'd be pushed to find a person who doesn't respect beyonce. i've met plenty of people who aren't 'into' her, or think she's which i stare gormlessly at, shocked, and forcing them to watch her Super Bowl performances. i am a beyonce advocate, and she could sing baa baa black sheep and i'd probably weep. but lemonade feels different to me. it feels like finally, beyonce has become relatable. 

beyonce is a superstar. a seemingly untouchable woman who does no wrong. a woman who oozes star quality, with a power house voice and the rhythm to match. her interviews and carefully edited documentaries present her as a woman with spiritual depth, but i will admit i've never felt connected to her. she's so media trained, and her brand is so perfected and well oiled, i never felt she could slip or present herself as anything less than perfect.

that's until lemonade.

lemonade is a visual concept album full of insecurities, crazy thoughts, depression, anxiety, anger, revenge. beyonce roars as she screams 'this is your final warning, you know i give you life.' her voice is not perfect, it growls and trembles as her emotions come to the surface. lemonade takes you on beyonce's journey of (presumably) unfaithfulness, and with each chapter i felt more and more like she'd taken every woman's heartbreak and written it down. intuition. denial. anger. sorry. emptiness. accountability. reformation. forgiveness. resurrection. freedom. redemption. each chapter telling her own story of love and heartbreak. 

jay z and beyonce are a well oiled machine, and i am not in anyway naive to the pr job at work here. but, in my eyes, it's her way of settling the rumours of their turbulent marriage her way. beyonce is a woman of fierce power, the total boss of any room she enters. the media and tabloids are one thing she cannot control, and her dignified silence on rumours (hello solange in the elevator...) has ultimately been leading to this moment. the freedom to tell her own story. a chance for her to direct how these events felt to her. fantasise her emotions into a film, which may now distance her from the reality she lived in as she wrote. 

but why now? beyonce's albums in the past have alluded to the dishonesty in her life. 'ring the alarm', 'mine', 'why don't you love me' all feel like they could have belonged on lemonade. but, like any woman, perhaps the time wasn't right. perhaps these were stories she didn't feel completely ready to tell. it was still raw. but now, after seemingly coming out the other side, she feels ready to dictate exactly how it went down. narrate it the way she wants to, now she has forgiven whoever broke her heart. it is only when you can truly remove yourself from something that you can articulate it into something that feels real, and this is what lemonade has become for beyonce. it is her truth. and i feel that the album ending on formation, and it being the first song she shared with us from this new era, speaks volumes. she is already reformed, and now she is ready to share with us how she got there.

it's not black and white. like any love story, there are twists and turns in lemonade that often make you forget who you're rooting for. 'hold up' you want to be there with beyonce smashing her the car of the person who let you down, but 'sorry' (whilst sassy as hell) shows you there are two sides to every story. i don't doubt that beyonce played this man at his own game, avenging his betrayal with her own games. two wrongs don't make a right. but the emotive 'sandcastles' tenderly reminds you that love is complicated, and perhaps there is room for forgiveness if it's worth fighting for. 

lemonade is not just important for beyonce's soul, and the way it has already become a pillar of musical importance, but it has so many more themes running in the visual album that are of paramount importance. raising awareness for black lives and the racial tensions, family issues and dealing with childhood anxieties... it's full of importance on levels i still haven't discovered. it is not just another trivial pop album. it's one we will discuss in schools, universities, lectures for years to come.

beyonce sings 'i'm not too perfect to ever feel this worthless.' a lyric that turned her from a superstar, to a real woman for me. if you do one thing today, watch her visual album. then listen to the music. you won't regret it.

phew. i'll calm down now.

until next time xo

Monday, 11 April 2016

kourt k - kylie cosmetics review

(kourt k - kylie cosmetics)

so there i was. relaxing on a sunday evening, with no plans to splash the cash or seriously damage my debit card...when i see an update on twitter with the words every girl wants to hear...


i threw caution to the wind, ran upstairs with a million reasons as to why i DESERVE this lip kit running through my mind. 'it was your birthday 3 months ago.... you hurt your toe yesterday.... you haven't bought anything in 24 minutes...' and sure enough, in a wild frenzy of refreshing and hoping...kourt k by kylie jenner was mine.

if you've read this previous post about my candy k experience, you'll already know that i'm a fan of ms.  jenner's matte offerings, so it's no surprise that i am again a big fan of this more dramatic shade. but let's start over, as this is a totally different kettle of fish.

kourt k is a deep plum shade, a vampy purple that in some lights can look black. i love this about it, as in certain shades people might not know what you're rocking, and then the sun hits and BAM you're basicallyy a goddess. 

when you first apply the colour, it does make you breathe in for your life a little. when i first swiped the vanilla-smelling formula across my lips i felt a little bit like i'd smeared chocolate across my lips. this is in no ways bad, as it proves just how pigmented and colourful is is...but it does also mean there's no room for error. when this bad boy drys, you better hope you were tidy with your application or you're going to have one hell of a job taking it off to re do. just saying. 

i would recommend covering all of your lips in the lipliner as a solid colour base, this way the lipstick then has something to stick to and if there are any cracks you have colour underneath to even it out. it's the perfect shade for a vampy night out, teamed with all black eerrythang and a bit of sass then you're good to go. i actually wore this cleaning round the there's definitely room for, erm, versatility with this colour.

i am definitely biased after purchasing two lip kits now, and i truly mean it when i say they're worth the pressure of the restock, the wait for delivery, and even the extra customs if you're unlucky enough to have to pay for it. they're super pigmented, really long lasting (seriously NOTHING removes these...), and just gorgeous colours. i am beyond excited for her metallic range coming. 

kylie girl, what you got up your sleeve next?

until next time xo

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