(standard blogging essentials)
I started blogging two years ago, when the big names like Zoella were still hidden secrets. When ‘normal’ people didn’t know what the Naked palate was, and what the big deal was. When taking photos on your iPhone was OK. Fast forward to today, and it’s a very different world. Zoella is in Vogue, and a bestselling author. The Naked Palate is as necessary in a girl’s handbag as mascara, and iPhone photos are frowned upon. As a fashion blogger, it’s hard to find your place in this crazy world.
And even more so, when you’re a mediocre blogger.
This isn’t a cry for help. Or attention. It’s mainly a musing I’ve felt recently, one that has actually encouraged me to be better. But recently, I’ve felt a very prominent issue coming to the forefront of my mind when I post, or tweet. I am mediocre. My blog is not special, it is not outstanding, it is not getting the views I feel it deserves. And I was, actually, a bit upset about this.
It all started when we had that bloody fire. My blog was doing OK, I was working with good companies, getting a little bit of money, and feeling like I was working my way up. Then, the fire ruined everything. It took my clothes, my camera, my laptop, and my motivation. I didn’t blog for a while, which wasn’t intentional, I was just busy. But, when I started up again, I felt my content was lacking – my photos weren’t as good, my clothes weren’t me, and I felt I had lost my mojo. I started creating content I THOUGHT I should be making. List posts, nostalgic posts…whilst these did well, it didn’t feel like ME. I wanted to be posting about fashion, about the clothes I loved, the shows that stood out to me… and on the flip side, I wanted to start commenting on things that mean a lot to me. Like social media, mental health, and just feeling generally strange at 22.
After hitting a wall on a rainy Sunday afternoon (when I say that, I mean I cried because I missed my blog) I decided to do something about it. I bought a new camera, which had a hefty price tag, but has made me feel so happy I almost don’t care. I started thinking more creatively, which is easier to do when you have an amazing camera. I started bullying my friends + family again to take photos of me. And I’m starting to feel a little more fashion fumblings and less fashion ramblings…
I feel that there’s a lot of ‘oneupmanship’ in blogging. You always feel jealous of people’s opportunities, you see people who started at the same time as you doing well and you think why isn’t that me? I was once, believe it or not, nominated in the same category as InTheFrow, who has gone on to KILL IT. It makes you feel inferior, like what is the point?
Also, since blogging has BLOWN UP, it’s been very hard for the middle men to make the cut. You see a lot of the same bloggers covering the same new releases, and think why didn’t I get asked? Brands you once had strong relationships with now no longer reply to your emails, as there is now a skill and an algorithm to blogger relations . It’s no longer based on human intuition. It’s a numbers game, and if you haven’t got it, the big-wigs don’t want to know – after all, how can they make any money from a mediocre blogger? It can be tough to feel motivated as you begin to feel dejected.
But believe me, there’s always a point. A blog is a labour of love, a piece of work you slave over when you could be watching Netflix or out with your friends. To quit now would make the 2 years of posing against walls pointless, and I wouldn’t want to. I love blogging, and it’s a real hobby I have thrown myself into.
I hope moving forward my blog continues to grow a little every day, and feel more brilliant than mediocre. After all, we all want to feel special – and there’s room for all of us. This is not a cry for help or attention; it’s a sigh of relief as I get this off my chest. And aim to be better.
Until next time xo